I've been gone for a while, and I apologize for that. Although at the same time, it's like I almost never left. If that makes sense, which it probably doesn't. And for those of who out there who care a lot has happened and even though I'm still not sure who I am I have a better idea. Still trying, still breathing, for now at least.
Most of what I've been doing lately is thinking, sitting and wishing and waiting and thinking and everything you do when there's too much on your mind to do anything else. And it's funny then exactly where the time goes. How it flies but at the same time it almost lasts forever, how one thought can drag on for so long you completely lose yourself and forget where you are and when you are. Even sometimes who you are. To borrow one of my favorite quotes from Alice in Wonderland "I can't explain myself, because I'm not myself you see." Funnily enough I don't think any of us ever truly know who we are, we can take guesses, and we learn along the way, yet I think many die wondering.
Alas, didn't we spend most of our life wondering? Should we not wonder? Is it a waste? Me personally, I don't think so, I think that throughout our thought process we destroy everything we know and rebuild it from scratch. We rebuild our beliefs and friends and life and ideas and outlook on everything that we completely rebuild ourselves. We are not us. We are who we build ourselves to be, whether it's a conscious effort or not.
Time goes where we want to go, and every moment you have ever lived is still alive in that moment of time it is stuck in, there's no past or future, but a single moment along a string. It's easy to remember and sometimes relive, but we use this to build more.
The time goes where we let it and where we want it. The time goes where we go.
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